That One River Phoenix Scene...

Good evening, y'all...I have not written in like a week...Which I really apologize for...I cannot believe it's been a week...Time flies when you're doin' a high school musical...Lets get this blog entry over with...

The pictures on today's entry were all taken on the East side of the island...John and I took a drive down that way one day...It's the furthest I ever went on the East side and it was actually very pretty...And secluded...We had to drive through twists and turns on a curvy road that stretched along the mountainous, cliffy shoreline...It was kinda scary at some points...But as you can see from the images, it was also tremendously beautiful...Oh, and that second picture above is of a old haunted schoolhouse we visited...I'll talk all about that in a moment...

Those two pictures above are actually of the last village on the East side...The road ends in this village and doesn't continue...It was a quaint, quiet village...You can see the church in that picture above...There's some days where I imagine myself moving to one of these small villages with my family and just living a happy, simple life...In an isolated, rustic village like this, I'm sure days are slow and effortless and monotonous...And I'm sure the days and weeks and months and years go by slower than a slug on salad...But I think that's what I find so appealing about these villages...Life would go by leisurely and gently, and time would take its time for me...I feel too rushed right now...And I feel like I was just 8 two months ago...My life is flying past me...And soon I'll be old and dying and wondering where my life went...

See those green houses deep in the jungle?...A family started a business years ago where they grow flowers in those green houses...The flowers are used for arrangements in funerals and church services and weddings here on island...Most of the flowers are flowers that can't be grown in our island environment...A green house can produce flowers from the states...I guess the family is rich now...With tons of land and their own personal beach...Which I've heard is gorgeous...Look what one simple idea can do...I mean, they found a need on the island and became rich off that need...I'm so jealous...I wish I would've thought of that!...

Alright, well, let me explain the bad news first...You see, we had musical practice on Monday during the day...There was no school on Monday because of Columbus Day...So, I decided to organize a big practice with all of the ensemble actors...We have two big cast scenes, the town scene and the ballroom scene...And we have a large group waltz where about 15 couples dance...Anyways, we went on the stage for the first time to begin practicing the dance...Well, I came home last night from that practice and noticed that my camera was missing...It had completely disappeared...I tried to retrace my steps to discover where it was...I know I brought it to practice because I was planning on taking pictures of the kids...I placed it in the small pocket on my backpack...I never ended up using it though because we were just way too busy to take snapshots...I also know that my backpack was in my classroom the entire day...Next to my laptop...My classroom was locked all day...Now, I will not go into details here because this isn't Murder She Wrote, but one of the doors to my classroom (there's two) is very easy to get into...I have a feeling a student when in that door as we practiced down at the stage...It's weird that the culprit didn't take my laptop, so maybe this wasn't the scenario...The only other option is that it was taken as I was giving announcements in my classroom at the end of practice...There was about 40 teenagers in my room...And it was pretty hectic...A sneaky teen could've easily and quickly snatched it right from under my nose...

Either way, my camera is gone...My precious, beloved digital camera that my mom gave me for my graduation...Don't worry, I'm not writing about this incident to get sympathy or to even express my sadness and anger...I'd like to discuss something that happened afterwards...Something that got me thinking about reputation and the ways in which teachers can jump to conclusions about their students...

When I was talking to the boys last night after becoming extremely upset about the stolen camera, they mentioned seeing a boy named Tevita near my bag...They also said that Tevita has a reputation for stealing...I know who this kid is...He's actually a kid who has had some difficulty in the past year or so...He has been moved around from foster home to foster home...I guess both of his parents are not willing and able to take care of him so he has gotten sorta lost in the system...From what I know, he has been living in a boys home on the island...He gets poor grades and he's not really a trouble maker per se but he's more of a emotional, careless kid who loses his temper every once in a while...I've also heard stories about his family...Stories of abuse and alcholism...(I used to go to a church that had a family who took him in for a few months...This family has told me how troubled Tevita is)...His brother was recently accused of stabbing someone to death outside our local bowling alley after a night of drinking...He's in the island jail for that...I don't want to write a psychological dissertation, but I wanted to explain that this Tevita kid has a bad reputation...And maybe some of this reputation is deserved...Sure, he's had a challenging life, but does he have to have negative behavior because of that?...Anyways, I started thinking about this kid and wondering if he was the kid who stole my camera...The pieces kinda fit...And I could see that Tevita, with his criminal history (even if it is just in the family), might've been the burglar...I began to put clues together...But the clues didn't really lead to Tevita...He's a boyfriend of one of my dancers in the musical...He's actually been helping dance, as well...Yesterday, at the practice, he was a wonderful assistant in helping ensure that all of the dancers were on beat and snychronized...For the entire afternoon he was walking between the dancers and giving advice and directing them to the correct formations...I was even proud of the boy...He seemed on task and motivated...I put the thoughts of Tevita and his guilt aside...I just didn't see how he could have stole it...Well, this morning I began to question other students that were at the musical practice...I would ask each student individually if they saw anyone searching through my bag...Many of the kids mentioned, once again, Tevita's name..."I would ask Tevita...I think I saw him looking in your bag"..."Neman, it was Tevita...He's known for stealing things"..."It's got to be Tevita"...Needless to say, student after student kept pointing fingers at Tevita...And I began, once again, to question his innocence...What if Tevita did take it?...What if his good behavior was a disguise?...What if my anxiety over falsely accusing him was clouding my judgement?...What if his bad reputation was making me believe he actually had a wrong reputation when he really did have a bad reputation for a legitimate reason?...Sole, what's a teacher to do?...Well, I conjectured whether or not I wanted to question Tevita...I didn't want to be one of those teachers who falsely accuse a kid just because they have a bad reputation...But I also didn't want to have my camera stay missing...I mean, what if all these other kids were right?...

I eventually did talk to Tevita...Essentially, I told him that I didn't think he did it but other kids were saying things and I just wanted to listen to his feelings on the situation...He told me about a time last year where a student falsely accused him of stealing some CDs...I guess it ended up being a different student...But a whole group of students jumped to conclusions and believed he was the criminal...They even threatened to beat him up...Now, he has this incorrect reputation for stealing...Of course, this was coming from the kid who has behavior and psychological issues...A kid who has been abused and neglected...A kid who has been passed around from random, strange households to other random, strange households like a poor, used ball...A kid who probably hasn't been surrounded by true love in his life...But for some reason I had faith in his word...I believed him...I let him go...And all I kept thinking about was Chris Chambers from Stand By Me...

There's a superb, emotional scene in the classic film Stand By Me (one of my all time favorites) where the character Chris Chambers, played intensely and sincerely by the late River Phoenix, cries to his best friend about an incident at school...Y'all remember this scene?...Basically, River Phoenix's character is falsely accused (sort of) of stealing lunch money...The reason everyone thinks he did it is because of his family's reputation in town...Well, later he discovers that his teacher, the one who accused him and punished him, kept the money even after he confessed his mistake...It's a sad scene of teenage angst and confusion...And a scene of injustice inflicted on a student by a teacher...Here's a clip of the scene from YouTube...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eGj8UDXVffg

So, did I do the right thing?...Should have I even talked to him?...Maybe I jumped to conclusions?...Although I never really accused him of the crime, could my talking to him been just as hurtful?...I mean, he actually had a excellent day at the practice...And now his reputation and his family's history has effected that?...Has influenced my judgements of him?...My treatment of him?...I realize I never officially accused him, but I'm sure that even this simple questioning made him feel somewhat victimized and angry...Right?...How much should a teacher listen to a student's reputation?...I guess any answer to these questions leads to one main point...That teachers have a powerful effect on kids...For good and bad...One mundane comment or incident can ruin a child's day...Maybe even hurt their self-confidence for years to come...Lawd, this is a tough job...But somebody's gotta do it...

The next few images are of a haunted old schoolhouse that John and I went to visit...Gosh, it sounds like my life has become a Scooby-Doo episode...Anyways, this ancient, decaying, vacant mansion used to be an all girls elementary school...Legend says the spacious, colossal building, which, since it sits upon a hill, visitors must walk a lengthy, treacherous crooked staircase to get to, was built on spiritual, ancestral graves...The female students began to go crazy and became possessed by demonic appartitions...The hauntings and poltergeists got so dangerous and frightening that they eventually closed down the school...They even tried to re-open the building as an apartment complex for contract workers like myself...But the ghosts kept disturbing the peace...For the past twenty years or so it's been becoming more and more derelict...And spooky...John and I have plans to camp out here on Halloween...Insane?...Probably...Brave?...Sure...Fun?...Definetly...

Spartans!...Bring the ghosts on!...

My Five Favorite 80's Movies about High School:

5. Teen Witch = Most people might've put Teen Wolf on their lists, the more popular choice...Lets face it, Teen Witch is a total knockoff of that movie...But Teen Witch gets my vote because I'm gay...And I related to a teenage girl using spells to change her high school experience, like becoming popular...I mean, who didn't dream of that ability as a teen?...Oh, and that classic rap "Top That" is so 80's kitsch...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jEa1BYBgeQI

4. Pump Up the Volume = This controversial, thought-provoking Christian Slater flick is a little bit obscure to most people...But try to rent it and watch how intellectual and stirring this movie about teenage rebellion is...A radio disc jockey in the suburbs has never been this dangerous before...Besides, the music alone is killer...

3. Heathers = The Mean Girls of my generation...A wickedly funny, devilishly sarcastic, darkly twisted study of high school...Its sharp and clever thoughts on teenage suicide are shocking yet amusingly true, and its performances by Winona Ryder and Christian Slater are to die for...This movie is bitching...And who can forget that timeless masterpiece of a quote?...Click the link below if you don't know what I'm talking about...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LQ-3rikUQ34

2. The Breakfast Club = This somewhat melodramatic, cheesy film is also really moving...And universal...I think all teenagers adore this movie when they first see it...There's a character for everyone to relate to...The popular girl...The nerd...The goth...The athelete...The rebel...Who knew a simple Saturday morning detention (and some weed!) could bring so many different kinds of cliques together in harmony and understanding...If only high school was as easy...

1. Lucas = I remember watching this movie over and over again and falling in love with Lucas every time...It's a wonderfully poignant and lovely story about a quiet, smart, unpopular, and poor teen boy who couragously initiates himself into the high school football team...It sounds like a typical inspirational sports movie...But there's a friendship that grows between him and a popular girl that becomes the true heart of this tenderly honest flick...Oh, and you can't have a 80's movie about high school without Corey Haim!...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LgR0tF1XXRQ

Alright...I just wanted to quickly talk about something positive that happened because of my camera being stolen...Er, I don't think it was quite positive...But I want to assure everybody that my life here on the island isn't all bad...You see, on that night my camera was stolen I was devastated...That camera was my life...And I suddenly longed for home...And my family and friends...I wanted to bawl my eyes out...And in the bathroom I did...But, luckily, the boys were over to cheer me up...They were genuinely worried about me and even began to crack jokes, as always, to make me laugh...I eventually stayed up until about 2:00 in the morning with Sammy just talking...And helping him study for midterms...I felt better by the end of the night and I realized that the camera isn't my life here...There is so much more for me...Including my family and friends I've created here...As much as I can admire these beautiful pictures I have taken with my old camera of gorgeous scenery, there's no beauty like the relationships and moments I have here on this island...There's no beauty like those moments where I feel loved...I think you can only experience this sort of feeling when you're away from family and friends and home...I've never appreciated the beauty and importance of friendship like this before...No picturesque images of this island can ever compare to these magnificent moments of life I've experienced...

K...I gotta go...So, what did you think about my camera being stolen?...Was it right to become somewhat suspicious of Tevita?...What's your favorite scene from Stand By Me?...Do you have as much of a crush on River Phoenix as I do?...What's your favorite 80's movie about high school?...

Much alofas to y'all...Love ya and miss ya...

-JOE

"And me, I still believe in paradise. But now at least I know it's not some place you can look for, 'cause it's not where you go. It's how you feel for a moment in your life when you're a part of something, and if you find that moment...it lasts forever..."

-from the 2000 film The Beach