We Go Together Like Ramma Lamma Lamma Da Dinga Da Dinga Dong...

Hello, family, friends, and neighbors...How y'all doin?...alright, this is your challenge for today's blog entry...i really wanna make this entry short and sweet...so...stop me when its gettin too long...no, seriously...tell me to "shut up"...to "close my yapper"...to "seal my pie hole"...do whatever you need to do to make me cease writing...like i said, i want this post to be brief...so, please, people!...help me make it short!...

anyways, lets play "spot the fafafina"...how many fafas do you believe are in the picture above?...be careful...focus...and guess a number...a prize will go to the winner...

the pictures in this post were taken at our flag day celebration on friday...to reward the kids for working hard on the flag day performance, the school gave them a dance with pizza and ice cream...and a half-day...well, dances here on island are different than the ones in the states...the dances here are right after school and the kids dont get all dressed up or anything...they just stay at the school and dance to music in the gym...and then it becomes organized chaos...with teenagers everywhere and taking control and goin wild...its actually kinda scary...but fun...whats ironic is that most of the kids that were rewarded with the dance didnt even participate in the flag day performance...so, not only did they miss all that school when we had off days to practice the performance, but they also had another half-day off to shake their tail feathers during this party...even more learning flushed down the drain...whatever...im so over it...

the topic of the blog today deals with love...samoan love...theres one aspect of the island dealing with love that is kinda interesting...wanna know what it is?...there is absolutely no public display of love on this entire island...in fact, its seen as extremely disrespectful and inappropriate...now, i know in the states this is somewhat true, too...i mean, maybe kissing in public isnt considered disrespectful...but i think people in the states view it as taboo...and annoying...in american samoa, any form of physical affection in the sight of others is rude and prohibited...i, of course, never see samoans sucking face in public...but i also never see them kissing...sure, ill see friends, especially girls, pecking eachother on the cheeks...however, ive by no means seen a guy and girl romantically kissing eachother...in fact, i dont think ive ever observed a couple holding hands...or hugging...or holding eachother...lisa and i have noticed that when we're with families we sometimes cant even distinguish who the husbands and wives are...who the mother and father is...and thats because theres no way to identify them...one reason why is because men and women seem to be a lot more segregated here...theres the men talking about man stuff...and then theres the women talking about woman stuff...theyre all very separated...the other reason, though, is that theres no display of affection between couples...as i said, theres not even the holding of hands...or even standing close to one another...i guess many samoans believe that all forms of physical love should be kept for inside the house...for inside the bedroom...all public displays of adoration and tenderness are strongly looked down upon...youve gotta hide your love away on this island...

i suppose, im against this...i can understand seeing unrestricted flaunting of love as disrespectful...i mean, sucking face at the local mcdonalds is a little obnoxious...or even groping eachother at a bar is tad bit nas-tay!...and dont even get me started on the couples who sit next to eachother in a booth at a restaurant...(please, nerds, sit ACROSS from eachother!)...nevertheless, i kinda miss that display of fondness between two lovers...seeing couples holding hands and hugging, although at times grating, sorta adds love and ardor into the air...besides, why should two people who love eachother have to keep their love a secret?...essentially, thats what i think samoans are doing...they disgrace and demean eachother when showing their love through public affection...they see it and call eachother disrespectful...or inappropriate...or, even, slutty or gross...and sinful...in the end, they become ashamed of their love for their partner...and see love as indiginity or humiliating...maybe im reading into this topic too much...but what do y'all think?...is public displays of affection really all that bad?...should it be shameful?...should it be banned?...if you guys have been watching the news lately, you will have seen that story about richard gere kissing an indian actress in india...right in front of everybody at a AIDS campaign...well, he got arrested...and she's being prosecuted in court...this particular case could be more of sexism...india might see women showing their physical love for a man as offensive and brash...india is saying its againt the law...they see public displays of love as indecent and vulgar...what im trying to say here is that many areas of the globe seem to agree with american samoa...physical exhibition of tenderness is crude and improper...is american samoa right in believing this?...or are americans and their public displays of kissing and holding hands and hugging and other forms of affection honest?...and beautiful?...and, even, important?...

http://www.cnn.com/2007/SHOWBIZ/Movies/04/26/gere.arrest.reut/index.html

Vent of the Week:

okay, i know many of you will be disgusted by this conversation...but i have to express myself...i think my cyst is coming back...you know, that growth on my face that exploded a couple of years ago...and it became this ginormous, uncontrollably mounting mass of skin on my jaw line...and then i had to get it painfully removed and stitched up...it was excrutiating...well, the same cyst has grown back...and the last few days its began to hurt...i really dont want to have to get it removed again...though i know i will...im hoping i can just wait till next year when im back home...i mean, i dont want to have the surgery while im home this summer...cause then ill have a nasty ass bandage on my face the whole fricken summer...but i also dont want to have the surgery here on island...now that would be scary as hell...i dont particularly trust the hospital on island...and im sure their tools and resources for the surgery would be archaic...and lacking...itd probably be ten times as agonizing...either way, it sucks my white hairy butt...i really dont want to deal with this...argh!...i suppose it could be a lot worse...i suppose i should be thankful for my relatively good health...but ya know...i had to vent those thoughts...

oh, i just wanted to quickly answer tiffany's question she posted in a message a couple of weeks back...she said her favorite blog entry was the one where i discussed teenage dating...and she asked me what my thoughts were...well, im not gonna repeat the whole discussion, but like public displays of affection, teenage dating is totally taboo and insolent on island...and i do agree with this at times...i have many students who are dealing with secretive dating and their minds are completely distracted from their education...i mean, theyre obsessed with their puppy love...and it does effect their learning...but i also think its a integral and special time to explore love and sex and all that stuff...anyways, one of my students came to class crying the other day...i just kinda let her be...i didnt want to embarass her...well, we began to read and discuss a robert frost poem...(called birches...its a lovely poem)...in the poem, the writer, a "swinger of birches", says he enjoys climbing birches because he gets close to heaven...but he always loves it when the branches bring him down...(i love that image...y'all know how much i adore trees)...he says because "earth is the right place for love"...we discussed this line and many of the kids said he liked earth because "he could experience love" there...and in the tree he's "alone"...well, the girl who was crying disagreed and says, "umm, love is not all that great...id stay in the tree"...i was amused by her unique, authentic understanding...and i put the puzzle together that she mustve been sad over a boyfriend issue...(i later found out her boyfriend was cheating on her)...i and the other kids understood her point of view...but we also told her that the reason why the "swinger of birches" wants to come back down to earth is to experience all the phases of love...the ups and downs...the heartbreaks and the joy...and that in the tree, or in heaven, he couldnt experience any of that...i think it made her feel a little better...and i guess she totally dumped his ass that day during lunch...you go girl!...theres plenty of fish in the sea...

congratualtions to the boys baseball team...they won the island high school championship...yay, warriors!...not that you guys care...but it was exciting...yes, i live a sad, little life...

the last two pictures are of our gym renovation...i dont know if you guys remember what our gym looked like before but theyve done some construction and have added a very cool stage...i know, in the states this gym/auditorium would be viewed as "ghetto"...here, though, its considered impressive...and, i think, kinda wonderful...

speaking of the new stage, im beginning to plan the school play i wanna do next year during first semester...id love your guys' help in regards to this conflict im having...you see, i was first considering doing grease...its a musical that everyone knows and loves and i know the kids would absolutely adore doing this play...and i know theyd put on a brilliant performance...but the rights to the musical are expensive and difficult to get...i just called the company and they wanted tons of paperwork and information...how many seats in the auditorium?...how much money will the tickets be?...when are we performing the play?...now, i technically wanted to do it the legal, professional, organized way...but with this whole copyright crap, im startin to think of just doing it illegally...some have said that id totally get away with it...i know of a company where i can buy the script and the music for like 30$...and then i could just make copies...but thats illegal...and, also, a musical would be really hard to do...id have to direct the acting and the singing and the dancing and the props and the set design, etc....i dont think ill be able to get very much help from the other teachers...so, now im thinking of doing a easier play...not a musical...i was thinkin like romeo and juliet...although, lisa says that the ESL audience members may have a difficult time understanding it...so what if i changed it?...or even translated it to modern language?...or maybe even made it samoan?...i mean, make the characters and their environment samoan?...gettin shakespeare plays are completely free...and i could see it being a little bit less stressful...as far as preparation...therefore, what the heck should i do?...give me some ideas...or advice...please!...

okay...i think ive said what i needed to say...this post is out, dawg...leave me a message...what do you think of public displays of affection?...what do you think i should do about my cyst?...when was the last time you discussed a poem in a class?...dont cha miss that?...(i pine for college again)...and what school play should i do next year?...

thanks to all those people who leave me messages...big shout out goes to shawn and tiff...and nellie...and all y'all who leave messages...even if its in emails...(ahem, suzy and kristy!)...keep the love comin...love ya and miss ya...

-JOE

p.s....the following quote really expresses my emotions about staying on this island right now...am i only here for distraction?...i mean, is there something at home that im afraid of facing?...like loneliness?...or even love?...is this island an excuse for me not to have to experience those things?...or am i here for fulfillment?...youd think i would know the answer to this...but i dont...and everyday im here i feel differently...tonight, this quote is makin me wonder...

"I have wandered all my life and I have also traveled; the difference between the two being this, that we wander for distraction, but we travel for fulfillment."

-Hilaire Belloc

They've Got Some Fight In 'em...

Malo, y'all...man, this week has flown by...i feel like i just wrote on this damn blog...oh, well...here i am again to entertain and inspire and educate the masses...so, lets begin right away...

the pictures in this entry are mostly from flag day...i know, y'all are probably sick of flag day...but its a huge thing here...and someone gave me some pics that i thought were worthy enough to put on my blog...besides, i havent been snappin the pics in a while...though i did get my new battery and charger...god bless amazon.com...its a life saver...anyways, that image above is actually our principal...she had to dance for part of the performance...doesnt she look nice?...i believe, in my humble opinion, that she's the best principal on island...and im not just saying that because she's the principal of my tafuna warriors...although she makes strange and unprofessional administrative decisions ("lets all respect education...but lets take the day off since we won our basketball championship!"), i still think she has high expectations of the school...and i guess tafuna has improved tremendously under her leadership...we're the school with the most students on island, yet we have very little behavior problems and excellent school attendance...i guess tafuna has become one of the most admired schools on island, so i appreciate the woman a lot...

theres a pic of me and some teachers...look how white (and pink!) i am compared to those samoans...holy moly...i look like babe the pig...and i dont know why im not smiling...i think the sun was in my eyes or something...it was darn scorching out there that day...

those were pics of the slap dance...which turned out spectacular...im hoping to bring a video home of the performance this summer...

alright, lets start our discussion topic for today's blog entry...essentially, id like to talk about the fighting that goes on here in american samoa...i know, that sounds odd, huh?...but its actually a significant problem...i dont know if ive brought it up before, but theres fights, like physical ones, on the island all the time...especially at the high schools...at the beginning of the year i broke up fights almost every lunch period...it seems to have slowed down a bit...though i just had to separate one last week...which ill elaborate on in a moment...in any case, the fighting is rampant...theres fist fights all the time at the sporting events...brawls at the bars...clashes in the villages...(i hear about bloody battles between family/village disagreements constantly)...theres scraps at the schools...(ive also heard about angry parents going to beat the crap outta teachers that were "unfair" to their children...yeah, ive had nightmares of this happening to me)...theres wrestling matches between lovers, too...and i dont mean the romantic kind...(one of my students just physically struggled with her cheating boyfriend the other day)...i mean, these arent little, wussy fights either...these are violent, raging conflicts...bloody cruel and dangerous combats...its kinda scary...i mean, for some reason, samoans love to fight...

now, back to my story about the fight i had to separate last week...there were two boys in my classroom during lunch...i didnt know who they were, though ive seen them hangin out in my room often...i knew they were from the same village...nevertheless, they decided to begin fighting suddenly...i got up and stepped between them and i actually pushed one of the boys out of my classroom...and i kept the other kid in my room...i locked the door so they couldnt get at eachother...but i could tell that they were both uncontrollably angry and livid...red with wrath...i kinda laughed to myself though because i felt like i was putting too wild animals in cages or something...i mean, i was in one cage trying to calm one of the other animals down...while the other animal stood outside the cage and paced with frenzy...waitin for the other to come out and battle...he literally waited and instigated the kid that was in my room...it was pretty amusing...i guess you had to be there...another student that was watching the quarrel says to me, "mr. neman, just let them fight...they want to fight...they need to get it out...they need to represent their samoan pride"...and i reckon i said, "well, i dont want blood on my classroom floor...i just swept yesterday"...but the student's comment really got me thinking...and its what inspired this post...lets analyze what this student said and how it relates to why samoans fight...

• first, the whole "let them fight...they want to fight...they need to let it out" got me thinking...remember, this is coming from a lover...not a fighter...i dont think ive ever got into a fight before...cept maybe with dana...(yeah, you dont want to know...they were pretty vicious)...but since im from the states, i think ive also had it engrained into my head that fighting is bad...that problems shouldnt be solved with physical fueds...i could go on and on about how this mentality has led to a complacency in america...afterall, i dont see many americans getting pissed off and physically angry with their country...americans just kinda sit there...they dont get very emotional or passionate about things...(cept when we can get our hands on guns, since theyre everywhere, and shoot up innocent people)...we're kinda told not to do so...think about it...we're always being told to be polite and dont rock the boat...dont lose control of your emotions...keep your body parts to yourself...since the day we are born we hear "dont hit"...and we learn not to...and i think thats a good thing...but i also think that i can understand the samoan way of solving problems...dont get me wrong, i dont think fighting and hurting eachother is the answer...but what if i wouldve just let those boys fight?...let them "get it out"?...i, of course, wouldve never done that...but im sure their parents wouldve...i dont know exactly what i wanna say...i guess i can see why they fight here...its okay to them...they almost need to...its how they release their negative energy...its how they get rid of their passionately furious emotions...i think i actually saw those boys that same day talking...they had made up...what if it was just a conflict they needed to solve physically?...is that so wrong?...if you think about it, theyve been hit all their lives...by their parents and teachers and so on for punishment...its obviously accepted here...i especially think its wonderful when the kids get beat by their parents for fighting with other kids...is that irony?...or just stupidity?...either way, i think i can sympathize with the fighters here on island...its a part of their culture...its who they are...when theyre mad, they punch...when they get in a disagreement, they pound eachothers lights out...is that so wrong?...

• second, lets discuss the part when the student said "its representing their samoan pride"...i suppose, by examining this quote, a samoan who fights, and most likely wins, should be proud as all get out...i kinda explained this before, but it obviously seems to be a samoan culture thing...fighting and winning the battle, even for girls, is seen as triumphant and celebratory...and thats fine...i used to get so upset with my students who began fighting...and i cant believe im typing this but it doesnt seem to upset me anymore...i actually feel some admiration for it...i know, it sounds completely off...but i think i feel this way because im totally a coward when it comes to fighting...id never have the bravery and strength and, really, the emotion to seriously brawl with someone...i guess i find it exultant and victorious in kicking someone's ass...instead of just discussing and talking quietly about a conflict...you know, the american way...whats kinda strange about this though is that religion and christianity is also samoan culture...so why dont they look down upon this fighting?...i dont believe jesus was for punching the lights outta your enemy...was he?...the boys that got into a fight in my classroom are actually mormans...yup, mormans!...ive said this a billion times, i realize christians and religious people arent perfect...but why would the student say its "samoan pride" to fight when its also "samoan pride" to worship and live by jesus' ways?...its another ginormous contradiction ive found on this island...samoans love jesus...yet love to fight...how would jesus feel about this?...or is it not really hurting anyone?...what if physically solving a problem is alright to jesus?...is jesus proud when he sees people who are fighting for what they believe in?...he probably says that a few times in the bible..."fight against evil"..."fight for good"..."fight for what you believe in"...who knows, maybe he's smiling down on them...beating eachother to a pulp...yet acting with passion and emotion..."samoan pride" shining through...

sorry for the disorganized thoughts on the fighting in american samoa...i didnt really outline my ideas...but hopefully you got the jist...fighting is immoral and criminal...but samoan fighting is honorable and justified...(i cant believe im deeming this as true)...

the rest of the pictures in this blog entry were taken today by one of my students...she took my camera to their J.R.O.T.C. presentation at a local elementary school...ive told all y'all about this military program at the schools on island...so i wont go into my liberal dissertation on the recruitment of samoans into the army...and into iraq...and into roadside bombs...oops, i went into my anti-war diatribe...but i think its hilariously inappropriate for the program to be going to the elementary schools to recruit and teach about signing up for the military...startin kinda young arent we?..."hey, kids, wanna fight for a erroneous, illegal war?"..."heck, the military knows you samoans love a good fight!"..."samoans have a helluva lotta fight in 'em"..."so lets enlist 'em...even if they are kindergerteners"..."hell, maybe we could even send some of 'em over to iraq"..."who cares about the alphabet"..."we need soldiers"...oops, i did a liberal tirade again...didnt i?...my bad...

oh, and dont get upset with me...im mostly being sarcastic...MOSTLY...i have nothing againt the junior reserve officers training corps program...well, sorta nothing...

My Top Five Obsessions of the Week:

5. Hairspray = i dont mean the actual hair grooming product...im obsessed with the new movie musical that hits theaters on july 20th...yes, its based off of the original movie with ricki lake (which i remember shawn being a big fan of)...and the new flick looks like its gonna be a blast...a colorful, zippy, and delightful romp through 1960's pop americana...the music is splendidly campy..."good morning baltimore", "mama, im a big girl now", and "you cant stop the beat" are wonderfully bright and bouyant...and the cast looks excellent...john travolta (in drag!), michelle pfeiffer (singin!), amanda bynes (that girl from nickolodeon!), zac efron (that hottie from high school musical!) and queen latifah (singin the best song!)...so, get ready people...we are so seeing this grease-like musical this summer...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JHKwoE9xMnk

4. The Foot Cream My Ma Gave Me = wow, are my feet beautifully, silky smooth...theyre gorgeous again!...thanks mom for the cream that works wonders...wanna hear a funny story?...i put the cream on a couple of weeks ago in the morning...well, as i was walking to school it began to rain...and my feet got wet...my feet that had lotion on them...so i was slip sliding all over the place...my flip flops wouldnt stay on because they kept gliding right off my feet...it took me twice as long to get to school because i was tryin to walk without my shoes slithering all over the place...it was pretty challenging...and comical...but it was worth it to have my soft, velvety toes...

3. Notes on a Scandel = this is one frightening movie...get it at your local blockbuster today...i dont wanna tell you what happens...but its a classic, intense pyschological thriller in the vain of single white female and the hand that rocks the cradle...its also an intelligent commentary on loneliness and friendship...and betrayal...a powerfully terrifying portrait of obsession...with a creepy performance by judi dench...and a nightmarish soundtrack...

2. Suzy's Bachlorette Party = okay, i must be the first ever man to plan a bachlorette party...i think i might be the first male maid of honor ever, too...all i know is that suzy doesnt really wanna drink that much...and she definetly wants penis straws!...what the heck should we do?...i mean, i know what suzy and i love to do...but theres gonna be other women here...how do i please them all?...how do i make the bride-to-be happy?...what should we do to make the night memorable?...man, this is too much stress...well, i guess itll be worth it if im sippin out of a penis straw all night...yay, penis!...yay, girl power!...

1. "The Story" by Brandi Carlie = gosh, i dig this song...its the song from greys anatomy...the one for that video that played during the clip show a few weeks ago...i usually despise those best of clip shows (especially the survivor ones), but the greys anatomy one, hosted by denny, wasnt too bad...and the video, though cheesy, was actually kinda dramatic...anyways, this good ol' rock song is beautifully, emotionally sung...and amazingly catchy...its such a superb song that i dont even think about izzie and george and yang anymore...i think of my own friends and family...and i get all warm and fuzzy inside...and a lonely tear rolls down my cheek...as meredith would say, "pick ME, choose ME, love ME" ;-)

alright...im done...let me know what you think of today's post...what are your thoughts on fighting?...how about samoans fighting?...if your kid was getting beat up at school, would you teach them to defend themselves?...how do you feel about the j.r.o.t.c. program goin to elementary schools?...whats your top obsession of the week?...and do you enjoy penis straws?...

love ya and miss ya...

-JOE

p.s....the following quote is perfect for all y'all who arent traveling with me this summer...y'all have jobs or no money or no time...and so i dont have any traveling partners...grrrrrr...thats why this christmas im goin somewhere cool...maybe tokyo...alone, yes...but at least im goin somewhere...

"The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till the other is ready, and it may be a long time before they get off."

-Henry David Thoreau, Walden

Cave of Doom...

Hola, mi amigos... lets begin with a confession...my confession?...i have no idea what to write about tonight...i kept tryin to think about a topic i could discuss regarding the island, and, cheese-n-rice, im drained...i cant think of anything...so, this post is gonna be a real hodge podge of thoughts...i do know im gonna try to stay positive...tons of you claimed i was "crabby" in the last entry...yeah, i probably was...but cant i be crabby every once in a while?...i mean, you have to deal with my mood swings if youre gonna read my blog...livin on a random island in the south pacific is like goin through menopause...with the emotional break-downs and hot flashes and all ;-)

the pictures in tonight's blog entry were taken a couple of weekends ago...william, john, and i went hiking along the coast...ill explain some of the adventure throughout the post...it was a pretty short (only about 2 hours), relaxing (no traversing!) hike...but there was one little mountain we had to climb and i didnt do too well on it...usually im a rock star and i conquer the mountain with ease and determination...for some odd reason, this small ridge killed me...i was sweatin and gettin my asthma all up in my lungs...and i kept having to stop and take a breather...i felt subjugated...oh, well...

the above and following few pictures are of a rocky shoreline/pool that would fill up with rushing water when the tide approached...it was kinda cool...one thing ill definetly miss about the island once i leave are the hiking trips...and the exploring of the island...i love to see and discover hidden corners of the island...and experience a side of nature ive never experienced before...sure, sometimes the hikes are dangerous and tiring, but i always feel rejuvenated after i go on them...its difficult to explain in writing...i guess, after viewing the anciently beautiful and the stirringly vigorous natural places of this prehistorically dormant volcano (as you can tell, im fascinated with the awe-inspiring old age of mother nature), i am reminded of why ive decided to come here...sometimes i think im here for the kids...which, of course, i am...but im also here for myself...and ive always wanted to encounter strange, adventurous, inspiring, and exotic locales...ive always wanted to see the earth in all its power...ive always desired to reconnect with the natural world...nothing's man-made on these hiking trips...its pure, raw earth...and not many people get to experience that...

by the way, when i come home to wisconsin this summer, im gonna need some hiking partners...after exploring the island, ive realized how much of wisconsin i still have to discover...i know, i know...wisconsin probably wont be nearly as thrilling...or as raw...(afterall, all the hiking trails in the dairy state are probably paved and have signs and have been mapped out and have rangers watching your every move)...but im sure the state has wonderfully scenic hiking trails...and its excellent exercise...so, get your hiking boots ready for joe joe...

http://www.slackpacker.com/map_wi.html

so, this past saturday afternoon, i had two of my students show up at my house...now, surprisingly, i actually dont mind when they do this...my students are always stoppin by the house to get help with homework or to just say "hey"...i think ive told y'all before about how im kinda fond of the intimacy of the island...i appreciate and will definetly miss the close-knit, small community where everybody knows your name (theres my daily cheers shout-out) aspect of the island...everyone knows eachother here on island...its quaint and familier...i mean, i dont think ill be teaching anywhere else where ill walk down the street and hear "hi, mr. neman!" every five minutes (cept maybe earlville!)...and people are constantly saying "hi, mr. neman" when ive never even met them in my life...in fact, ive lately had little children (we live by a elementary school) say, "hey, neman!"...and ill look down and be like, "who the heck are you?"...i dont really say that but i think it...how do they know who i am?....its so creepy...yet very endearing...and comforting...i love that about the island...i feel like my presence is known...and im not lost in a mass of humans like it is in the states...

woah, i got a little off track there...as i was saying, two of my students came over unannounced on saturday afternoon...sammy, who ive talked about before, and gene, one of my favorite students (i know, i shouldnt play favorites...but every teacher has'em...dont be hatin)...they wanted to play ping pong...luckily, i wasnt too busy (i was about to take a nap, darn teenagers!)...anyways, we began to play ping pong...and then these two boys got hungry...in the states i wouldve laughed in their faces and said, "okay, go home and grab a bite to eat"...but since i know these kids and their situations at home, i was like, "okay, lets go look and see what i have"...well, i usually dont have to feed random people...in other words, i didnt have any real snacks...no chips or cookies or anything like that...only meal-type food...we started lookin in the cubboards and one of the guys says something to me i found to be hilarious...and a little insensitive...(im being sarcastic with that)...here's the conversation...

Sammy: ...you have hamburger helper...

Me: ...yup...you want that?...

Sammy: ...you must not cook...

Me: ...what's that supposed to mean?...

Sammy: ...you must not know how to cook...

Me: ...what do you mean?...its hamburger helper...thats cooking...(silence)...isnt it?...

Sammy: ...not really...do you even know how to cook rice?...

Me: ...umm...yeah...like rice-a-roni?...

i was like, "what the heck?"...its hamburger helper...thats "cooking", right?...and rice?...who makes rice?...unless its in a box?...and from san francisco?...well, i guess i have to remember that sammy's the kid that lives with only his lil' sis...his parents are gone and he has to take care of himself and his sister and the house...but i thought that was pretty funny...oh, and let me just warn y'all...DONT EVER HAVE TEENAGERS!...i fed them these hot-pocket thingys, chicken nuggets, crackers, and cookies (we had to get some snacks at the korean convenience store next to our house)...and they were still hungry!...my lord, they devoured all my food!...they even drank like two pitchers of kool-aid!...man, teenagers are like little grub vacuums...inhaling all food in sight...are all teens like that?...and then as they left (about five hours later!...we played ping pong that entire time) they said, "neman, when can we do this again?!"...i almost choked...thinkin "nooooooooooo!"...but before i could get anything out theyre like, "next saturday?...alright, see ya then, neman!"...i was like, "what just happened?...where's my food?"...

why must i look like conan o'brien?...and chuck norris?...i need some work done...

can i ask all y'all for some advice?...im startin to get worried about my mental stability here on island...especially concerning my maturity...let me explain...on saturday night we went cruisin around the island with a friend...thats the first question...when are you too old to go cruisin?...i mean, granted, we dont have a highway 100 on island...our idea of cruisin is drivin down the one road we have and maybe stoppin at a beach to chillax...and, then, as we drove i started stickin my head out the window and screamin "woooooooooo"...with both my arms outstretched and in the most high-pitched shriek ever..."wooooooo!"...the random samoan villagers were certainly, and aptly, confused...wide-eyed and heads turnin...perplexed and probably thinkin "what the!"...so, i ask you...when are you too old to stick your head out the car window and scream "wooooooo" at people?...and then i mentioned to our friend that we should go toilet papering...he's like, "samoans dont toilet paper"...i think he was disgusted with my request...i thought it was a perfectly normal request...i mean, when are you too old to toilet paper a house?...come on here...i suppose im just extremely bored...and the silly, immature things like the things i was doing that night make me happy...and fill me with joy...but am i too old for these things?...im 25!...i dont think throwing a roll of toilet paper in a tree should make me as delighted as it does...whats wrong with me?...

theres william trying to break open a coconut...what a weirdo...he actually did get a crack in it...but i didnt drink any...im not a big fan of the coconut juice...samoans always get mad at me when they offer and i refuse to drink it...i dont know...it kinda makes my tummy hurt...

okay, i wanna explain why i named this blog entry "cave of doom"...during our hike we stopped at a private, secluded beach...a picture of which is above...we went swimming and relaxed in the ocean...it was nice...until we went through the cave of doom!...there was this small little cave, or cove, that led to the other side of the beach...and the only way to get to the other side of the beach was to go through the cave...if you wanted to go around, the waves wouldve crashed and pushed you into the rocks...it wouldve been too dangerous...(i didnt take any pictures of it cause it was out in the ocean and i didnt wanna take the chance of dropping my camera)...the cave is low to the wavy water, so you pretty much have to wade through it, ducking your head so it doesnt hit the roof...so, when i say swim, youre not really swimming...just more like crawling through the water with your head above the water...get it?...well, john and william have the splendid idea of swimming through the cave to get to the other side...i tell them to go first...as i watch them slowly swim through the cave (the walls were sharp because of the coral), i see tiny black slimy creatures jumping all over the cave walls and into the water...these creatures were hopping all over the cave...like swarming william and john's heads...i was like, "aw, hell no!"..."i am not goin in that cave!"...john and william finally convinced me to go in it (by calling me a "girl"...how adult of them)...and you shouldve seen me go through that cave...first of all, ill admit that i turned into the most gay man of all gay men ever of all time in the whole universe...i think i even squealed "ew" a few times...i splashed around like a little girly mun...and i swam through it faster than the flash...i think i even scrambled over john and william like a frantically scared kitten cause they were goin too slow...i know, im not proud of it...but i dont like closed-in quarters, okay?...i get clausterphobic...and then add slimy black jumping creatures, and i go crazy...they were hoppin all over my head and face...i think i even felt a few slap up againt my noggin...it was so disgustingly disturbing...i had some throw-up in my throat as i escaped the cave of doom...i later was told that those creatures are called "rabbit fish" cause they hop over the water and on the ocean rocks...im like, "rabbit" and "fish" are two words that shouldnt be combined...fish are supposed to swim...not jump all over your face!...thats like saying theres "bird sharks"...can you imagine seeing sharks flying around and biting your face off!?...no?...well, i cant imagine tiny black slimy things jumpin all over me in a small, dark cave...we, of course, had to go back through the cave on the way back...and i freaked out then, too...hey, im usually brave when it comes to our adventurous hiking trips...but caves of doom are not my thang...

theres william and a crab...some of you have asked what the animal life is like on island...well, we dont really have any mammals...only fish and bugs and lizards and frogs and stuff like that...we also have birds and chickens and hogs...oh, and rats...we dont even have snakes...cept sea snakes...but thats about it...no monkeys (sorry shawn)...no elephants...no bird sharks...although, we do have cats...and feral dogs!...speaking of wild doggies, william and i always get in the argument over the ending of the movie cujo...(we're always gettin attacked by dogs...even when we're in cars...theyll bark and growl and jump up at the windows...fangs chomping!...i flip out and roll the windows up...william just looks at the dogs like theyre his buddies)...anywho, i think the ending of cujo, with the mom and the son trapped in the hot, broken-down car and the bloody, killer cujo waiting outside for them, is frightening...i mean, i keep saying that im gonna be in that situation some day on this island...he thinks its pathetically stupid...he says, "why dont they just wait til the dog leaves?"...im like, "cause cujo doesnt just leave!...he stays there lickin his chops til you have to get out and then he chases you to the kitchen and jumps through the window and attacks your face!"...william just doesnt get it...or does he?...what do you guys think?...is cujo as terrifying as all get out?...or am i a wuss?...

alright, y'all...sorry for the totally haphazard blog entry...i know theres nothing to really discuss...but try to leave me a message...just to make me feel loved...do any of you wanna go hiking this summer?...have any of you experienced the uncontrollably fierce hunger of a teenager?...is hamburger helper "cooking"?...do you think feeding my kids and playin ping pong with them was wrong?...i mean, in the states i probably would see it as crossing the line...but here it seems acceptable...is it?...is cruisin and stickin your head out the car window and screaming "woooooo!" and toilet papering immature?...how do you feel about the cave of doom?...what would you do if you saw a bird shark?...and should i be nearly as creeped out by the movie cujo as i am?...

thanks for your awesome responses to my blog entry election...almost everybody voted for a different entry...i guess that tells me that y'all appreciated and remembered many of the blog entries...they all got ya thinkin in different ways...thanks for your interest in my life here in american samoa...love ya and miss ya...

-JOE

"Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we would find it not."

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Raise the Flag...

Happy 60th Anniversary!...yup, its my 60th blog entry...that actually doesnt seem like that much to me...i feel like ive written a million of these things...i know ive been slacking lately and only writing like two or three blog entries every week, so maybe i should start writing more...60 in about 8 months doesnt seem like enough...anyways, thanks to all my blog readers for stickin with me...i couldnt have done it without y'all...a special thanks goes to those people that have been here since the beginning...who has read every single entry?...which was your favorite?...maybe we'll have a vote later in this blog entry...i really dont have any plan for tonight's discussion...so it may be chaotic...lets begin...

well, we finally got done with flag day...it was held on tuesday and wednesday...and, if you remember, its one of the biggest, most popular holidays here in american samoa...flag day is considered the day they became a U.S. territory, and they celebrate their culture and their joining of the united states with dancing, singing, and siva-ing...(or slap dancing)...as i mentioned in a previous post, all of the high schools produced and performed a celebratory, traditional dance presentation for all of the island to enjoy...tafuna's been working extremely hard to perfect our performance...and it turned out to be one of the best out of all the schools...i know, my judgement might be tainted...or biased...afterall, warriors are the best students on island!...but, really, we were considered to be the top performance...our formations were organized and prepared, our dance was the most impressive, and our singing was energetic and lively...im so proud of the kids...im glad its over though...its been a lot of work...and the kids have missed out on way too much education...speaking of that, school was canceled for today and friday...in other words, its been like another spring break...we've had four days off this week...im not too happy about it...the respect and care for education is almost non-existent on this island...and it makes me sad and frusterated...and angry...i dont believe theres any other place in the world that sees education in such a thoughtless, negligent way...but whatever...its not my people that will be left behind...

ive been kinda depressed lately because my stupid ass camera battery and/or charger is broken...so i have no battery power...luckily i was able to take some pictures of the festivities yesterday...and i have some pics saved up for future posts...but eventually i might be writing posts with no pictures...i know, it sucks...but we'll have to deal...i did buy a new one and they should be coming in the mail soon...anyways, i was unable to take video of our performance...so the images are kinda deficient...because theyre all taken from the back...thats where i had to stand...and dance...yes, this red-haired, palagi had to dance...i mostly just swayed...the classic white guy dance...im hoping to get the video recorded off of television and i can show you guys the performances when i come home...they were all very awesome...

okay, if i was a good, happy little samoan id make this post all about the beauty and splendor of american samoa, since flag day is all about being proud of samoan culture and history...but over the holiday we hung out with some friends from colorado and, of course, we had a wonderful bitch session about how messed up the island is...our friends are also contract teachers who work at samoana high school...theyve completed their two years and are leaving this summer...(i may discuss some of that later)...as we talked about all the negatives of the island, i realized how troubled and distressing the outlook for this island is...do i really wanna deal with it for another year?...can i really change anything?...or even inspire anybody?...here are just a few of the island's problems...

• the government is wickedly corrupt...they steal money thats supposed to be for the people...youd think this would be an easy problem to fix...i mean, this is america...vote them outta office...but it seems like everybody on the island steals...every day youll read about funds stolen by government officials...just this year alone, computers (along with many, many other resources and cash) that were supposed to be for the schools have magically disappeared...sure, the f.b.i. investigates and catches them...but then someone else takes office and does the same exact thing...even the government workers who are working with the people on island are stealing things...for example, our school recieved a television and computers from our p.t.a....guess what?...they havent been seen anywhere...one of the administrators or teachers or parents mustve taken them...theyre probably sitting in someone's living room...the island is riddled with corruption and lies and stealing like this, and it seems to be never-ending...i think the main reason why this is a problem is because the u.s. government supports them...in fact, the u.s. government is THE only source of all their funds...samoans dont pay taxes...so, when america bought the island to use for a military base, we agreed to finance their government and communities...and i simply feel like samoans believe this money is miraculously gonna keep comin their way...no matter what...and they dont notice the value of this money...if it was their own money going into their own taxes, maybe theyd be more respectful of government support...and less people would steal...

• another problem on island that pisses me off is the educational system...the teachers here are horribly lazy, irresponsible, and ill-equiped...i hate to blame it on the teachers...i mean, they do only get paid about 11,000 a year...(can you believe that!?)...but i dont think they have an excuse...i take teaching seriously...and i do my best to teach my students every day...but the teachers on island are reckless with their students...i wont even discuss the abuse (physical and sexual) on island (its pretty much acceptable to have sex with your students)...but i will mention how many teachers dont even teach...they just let their students talk and do nothing...heck, they may give their students an assignment from the book...but no instruction or activity is being used for learning...theres been countless times where ive walked down the hallways and have seen mass turmoil in the classrooms...also, many teachers dont even show up to work...and the kids are just left in the classroom alone...with no subs or supervisors...and then we cancel classes or have random half-days to celebrate school achievements...theres been a bunch of times where after our sports team has won a championship, the principle will reward the kids with a day off...and even the teachers get more giddy than a little school girl in a candy shop...wheres the respect for education?...wheres the desire to learn?...wheres the willingness to work hard for learning?...wheres the professionalism?...its nowhere on island...and that upsets me deeply...

• the last problem i wanna chat about is the physical abuse in american samoa...i know, we've discussed this issue plenty of times...and, surprisingly, many of you (including me) sometimes agree with this form of punishment...but as my friends and i talked about this issue, after we all had a few beers in us, i began to see the other side of this issue...the tragedy of the issue...you see, many of our students are beaten atrociously by their parents...theyre treated disgustingly...it sounds like an over-exageration...but ive seen it with my own eyes...i saw one time at a dance a boy get beat by his father...with a bat...there was blood all over the place...i guess the kid got into a fight with another kid...so, obviously, the father taught the boy not to fight by fighting with him...there was also a recent story of a teenage boy who slashed his uncles throat because he couldnt handle his physical abuse anymore...and the suicide rate is actually very high because of the abuse, as well...samoans say its a cultural thing...that its tradition and that its worked for years...that it makes their kids more respectful...that may be true...but no human deserves to get beat...especially into a bloody pulp...besides, does it really teach them anything?...the only thing it teaches them is not to be the one on the other side of the fist...it teaches them to fight and beat the other person...and not to be the one beaten...its hideously pitiful...and i dont think its gonna stop anytime soon...

alright, im done with my negative comments...next time ill be more patriotic and ill discuss the positive aspects of american samoa...i promise...its just that theyre so hard to find ;-)

speaking of corruption, one of my friends from colorado, who is just finishing her two year contract stay at her high school, is being treated incredibly unfair by the department of education...you see, when you leave after your second year youre supposed to have all of your traveling expenses back to the states paid for...and youre supposed to get paid during those last summer months, too...well, she asked if she could leave for back home in june (weeks after school ends) so she could be with family (i guess her grandpa is very ill)...the d.o.e. told her no and that she needed to stay the entire summer to work summer school...she was shocked by this...as am i...she didnt have to work summer school last year and it doesnt say we have to work summer school in our contracts...it does say that we get paid 12 months of the year and that our plane ticket home will be paid for if we stay our two years...she did do that, and theyre still saying that she will not get her summer pay or get her traveling expenses covered...its unbelievable to me...and disheartening...i mean, what if i stay and dedicate myself to this island for another year and they treat me with disrespect and disregard as they have done to her?!...i will be furious and anguished...afterall, im deciding to devote myself to this island's youth for two whole years of my life...they better appreciate that in the end...or im gonna go medieval...

OMG! The Best Viral Vid of All Time!:

you think im embellishing?...well, im not...have you guys seen this mini-movie online starring will ferrel?...its the most hilarious thing you will ever see on the internet highway...oh, my lord...i laughed obnoxiously after watching this pee-in-your-pants funny 2 minute vid...and that actress who plays the landlord, pearl, has become a web sensation...man, she's an excellently skilled actress...a future meryl streep...a someday dakota fanning!...not only does she freak me out (i would kill myself if i ever had a landlord as scary and as intimidating and as demanding as her!), but she's also a comic genius..."i want my money!!!"..."i need to get my drink on"..."im gonna smack you"...those are just a few of the now classic lines from this amusing lil' film...although i dont know if i support teaching child actors swear words, its still damn funny to watch...if youre a will fan, you have to watch this and let me know whatcha think...did ya love it as much as i did?...did it make you all delighted inside?...are you obsessed with pearl like the rest of us?...

http://sjl.funnyordie.com//v1/view_video.php?viewkey=3efbc24c7d2583be6925

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HLWZZhWMKfM

(this link doesnt have the best quality...but it might work best for people who have slower internet connections...and youtube will probably take it off soon...so watch it right now...)

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20035511,00.html
(a people magazine interview with the terrifying landlord, pearl)

thats our school secretary...im not gonna say anything about her...cept that she pays kids to give her massages...i walk into the office almost everyday with some student massaging her neck and feet...this island is so, so strange...

that kids name is iosefa...joseph in samoan...so, thats my name, too...start callin me iosefa (pronounced yo-sefa)...

Blog Entry Election:

so, i was thinkin that my blog readers could reminisce about some of their favorite blog entries outta the 60 that ive written...and they could try to elect their most favorite one...which entry made you think the most?...which entry do you remember the most?...which entry was the most entertaining?...here are a few entries that got the most responses...

"A Tearjerker and a Threat" = i discussed dollywood, school punishments, and "fuck finn"

http://samoa-joe.blogspot.com/2007/02/tearjerker-and-threat.html

"It's a Rerun" = i discussed whether or not i should stay my 2nd year

http://samoa-joe.blogspot.com/2007/02/its-rerun.html

"An Internal Conflict" = i discussed whether or not i should teach in a wealthy suburban school or a poor urban school

http://samoa-joe.blogspot.com/2006/11/internal-conflict.html

"Bush's Little Army" = i discussed the military preparation young samoans are forced to do

http://samoa-joe.blogspot.com/2006/10/bushs-little-army.html

"Me in My Lava Lava" = i think my picture of me just got y'all talkin

http://samoa-joe.blogspot.com/2006/08/me-in-my-lava-lava.html

"My Classroom at Tafuna High" = i described my classroom

http://samoa-joe.blogspot.com/2006/08/my-classroomat-tafuna-high.html

or is there a different blog entry you liked most?...maybe the ones where i discussed the dog problem or the way samoans sit in backs of trucks?...let me know, on our 60th anniversary, which entry you remember fondly...

alright, im done...talk to ya later...leave me a message...what do you think about the problems on island?...should i leave because of them?...can i do anything to change them?...even though my friend has had a unfair ending, should i still stay my two years?...what would you do if you had a awful landlord like pearl?...do you think its right for child actors to learn naughty words just for a laugh?...and what was your favorite blog entry?...thanks again for reading 60 of my random samoan ramblings...love ya and miss ya...

-JOE

"A man walks down the street,

it's a street in a strange world.

Maybe it's the third-world,

maybe it's his first time around.

He doesn't speak the language,

he holds no currency.

He is a foreign man,

he is surrounded by the sound

of cattle in the marketplace,

scatterlings and orphanages.

He looks around,

he sees angels in the architecture,

spinning in infinity.

He says, "Amen" and "Hallelujah".

-from Paul Simon's "You Can Call Me Al"