Centennial Hat...

Happy 100th Anniversary!...Yup, it's my 100th blog entry...Can you believe it?!...I don't know, it kinda seems like it should be more than that...I mean, it seems like I've written at least a thousand of these things...But I suppose that's because my entries are so fricken long...I swear, I write flippin' dissertations on this island journal...Anyways, I'll try to make this entry short...And sweet...

Once again, all of the pictures shown were taken on my trip to Hawaii...I actually mixed the images a little...So, you're actually looking at the final parts of me and Kristy's vacation...The middle part photos will be posted in the next blog entry...

The image above was taken at the Society of Seven show...I swear, I felt like I was on some Senior Citizen cruise ship cabaret or something...The singing and dancing in the show was actually pretty good...Cheesy...But good...

Those are pictures of the Dole Plaintation...Kristy kept telling me that there was a big difference with Hawaiian pineapples...That they were sweeter and better...Hell, I couldn't really taste a difference...Tasted like Pick 'n' Save to me...

Does that look like Hawaii to you?...Or South Dakota?...I say South Dakota...I can almost see Mount Rushmore in the background...

Recognize that building in the pics above?...Supposedly, that old house was used for the cafe in the movie 50 First Dates...I couldn't see it...I'm guessing it got a little run-down in the past few years...I remember that cafe in the film being quaint and beautiful and charming...This place just looked creepy...Kristy and I were spooked by some of the noises that were comin' out of it...They also say that some of Jurasic Park was filmed here...I didn't see no velociraptors...The magic of Hollywood is extraordinary...

Soccer Drama:

Okay, so I have a problem...Well, not quite anymore...It's somewhat been solved...You see, I was suddenly asked on Tuesday to be the assistant coach for the girls JV and Varsity soccer teams...Now, that would've been fine, but their first game was on Tuesday...The day I was asked to assist in coaching!...I agreed to help Naiomi (the head coach and the woman I worked with last year coaching) only because I figured I would just be helping with physical stuff and maybe paper work or supervision...Well, little did I know that I'd actually be head coaching...The JV and Varsity played games at the same time...Hence, Naiomi went over with the JV and she sent me with Varsity to coach their game...I was kinda pissed off (I didn't agree to head coach!), but I accepted the challenge and went with the Varsity girls...Well, lets just say that the girls were horribly ill-prepared...I later heard that Naiomi put the team together the day before...On Monday!...Half of the Varsity girls didn't have shin guards (which are required) and none of them had uniforms with numbers (which is required)...Luckily, the refs let us play with no uniforms...And they allowed the girls to use their flip-flops as shin protection...The game began, and then the shiznit really hit the fan...Let me just say that they didn't do so hot...They lost like 7 to 0...And there I was, on the sidelines, being looked at as the head coach to these Bad News Bears...It was humiliating...The girls didn't even know how to throw-in...The refs, the other team, and the audience were all like "Neman, what kinda coaching are you doing?!"...That's when I started to get really embarrassed and angry...I didn't even know any of the girls' names, let alone their positions and how they play...I thought it was a completely unfair situation for both the girls and myself...I left the soccer field that night feeling disgraced and fuming...Especially after Naiomi told me that the next game would be the next day...I was like "Aw, hell no...I am not putting myself through this suckiness again"...I hate taking control over something when it's half-way done, ya know?...I mean, I'm willing to be a leader and manage the soccer team...But I didn't go to any of the practices (because I wasn't a coach yet) and I didn't get to know the girls...Heck, the girls didn't get to know me either...I just despise taking over stuff other people have started...Particularly when it's already been done half-ass...Now, I've gotta pick up all the pieces and start from scratch...Which would've been fine if we had some time before the first game...But we have no time...So, I began to plan my refusal to coach to Naiomi...I talked to one of the boys about it and he said "But Neman, what if you can make the difference?...The girls need you!"...And then I felt all guilty inside...Man, that lil' flicker of shame stinks like hairy butt...I couldn't give up on these girls...No matter how horrific they played...I came to school the next day with the notion of taking the Varsity head coach position...But then, I guess, Naiomi got the boys head coach to coach the team...Technically, I was happy about that...I simply just didn't wanna try to fix that team...Although, it sounds like the new head coach doesn't want the responsibility either...I suppose I could've offered but yeah...I didn't want to...As of right now, I'm the assistant coach for the Junior Varsity girls team...Did I do the right thing?...Or did I fail the girls?...Or was it so not my fault?...Give me your advice!...

Here are some video clips of our trip...

Our crazy New Years Eve on the streets of Waikiki:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OARzxDyQ8N0

The Tahitian dance at the PCC Horizon Show:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5MgI0EWcVM

Sailing at Waikiki:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VL_s5gcv500

That Society of Seven show for Old Folks:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VgsQIo30VY4

Samoan Fire Knife Show:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h05BoqRrlqk

That horse I'm riding was the best horse I have ever had while horseback riding...He was so mellow and well-behaved...He almost never tried to go off the trail or bite for grass...Well, I was jinxed in the end...He bucked me off and I literally fell off my horse...That was the first time I've ever been kicked off a horse...It wasn't his fault though...The horse behind mine kept gettin' all up in my horsey's grill and my horse got mad...Or scared...Anyways, I'm alright...I just brushed off my shoulders and got back on the horse for this lovely picture above...

Kristy's horse is, er, um, well-hung...

Hat Drama:

Alright, the other problem I had this week was something that seems small to outsiders but really hurt me...Do y'all remember that green hat I bought in the Samoan section of the Polynesian Culture Center?...That farmer-lookin' hat?...Ya know, the one I was hella excited to wear?...Hmm, it's gone already...I wore it to school twice and on the second day it was stolen...By a student of mine...I was devastated!...And awfully depressed after it happened...All day at school I was guarding that hat with my life...I wouldn't let any of the kids touch it, even though they all wanted to cause it was such a "cool hat"...I guarded it like a hawk the entire day...And then at the end of the day some lil' brat took it...Sure, y'all might be thinking I'm being sarcastic or overexagerating...Afterall, it was just a ten dollar hat made from palm tree leaves...But it means so much more than that...It just wasn't this fashionable material item...It was more than just a hat to block the blazing sun on my two mile walks to school everyday...It was sentimental...For several reasons...Here are a couple...

1. I bought the hat on my trip to Hawaii...It was kinda a nice reminder of my vacation with Kristy and the memories we shared...

2. More importantly, it represented my pride for the Samoan culture...I was so happy to wear that hat and say that I was from Samoa...And I was incredibly proud to wear it...To show off my Samoan colors...And to present to the world my experience and connection with American Samoa...The hat was a symbol of my experiences here on the island and my love for those experiences...And my adoration for the culture...

Therefore, I was grief-stricken when one of the kids stole it...I honestly was tearing up on my walk home...And I cried like a baby when I walked in the house...I mean, I do everything for these kids...I have devoted my life entirely for them...I have left my family and home to teach them and help them...I love them more than they will probably ever understand, and here they are taking stuff from me...Even worse, stealing things that represent my appreciation of their culture...The next day I had a hard time looking at any of the students...I felt like they all didn't appreciate me...Even though it was just one student who did it...One egg spoils the bunch, right?...I did discover who took it...And she said that she gave it away...She said "sorry"...And that she'll try to get the hat back...But I told her it wasn't about the hat...And I told her "sorry" wouldn't make me feel all better...The act was more powerful...Her inconsideration for me was what hurt me...If I was to put myself in her shoes, I would probably realize that she didn't comprehend how important that hat was to me...And I also think it's the culture's fault...It seems to me that taking things without asking is totally accepted here...The item is seen as community property or something...Especially when it is an item owned by a palagi...Of course, all palagis are rich and can afford new hats!...Anywho, I suppose I'm over it now...What do you guys think?...Did I overreact?...Should I have been so mad at the girl?...Should I lose faith in all my students?...Do they realize what I do for them?...Or am I just a poor schmuck who gets things stolen from him?...

Those hula dancers above were shakin' their tail feathers at a mall in Waikiki...I swear that hot guy was lookin' straight into my eyes as he danced...He so wanted me ;-)

We went on a nice sailboat in the Waikiki harbor on one of our last days...The Mai Tais on this boat were excellently strong...I was drunk after one and a half of them...And I was feelin' a tad bit woozy...There were some moments I thought I was gonna puke all over the place...But it was still a relaxing, gorgeous trip out in the ocean...

Yup, that picture is for reals...Including the sexy surfer...

This was the bartender and some girls that Kristy befriended...Kristy kinda reminds me of Chad...She'll talk to anybody and everybody and their mothers...I hate making small talk...So, I hardly talk to people...Call me Mr. Anti-social...

Best restaurant on the island of Oahu...Their spicy fries are orgasmic...And their burgers are to die for!...Seriously!...

Ewww...I hate birds!...Can you tell from this pic?...

I gotta go now...Thanks for reading...All you peeps out there who have been reading since the first blog, leave a message and let me know...After 100 blog entries, how have I changed?...What do you think about my experiences here on the island?...Does it feel like you've read 100 of these entries?...And what about this soccer and hat drama?...Am I way too over-emotional here?...Or are my feelings legit?...

Thanks again for reading...It's been 100 blog entries, and y'all have stuck with me...I hope you stay with me until the end!...Love ya and miss ya...

-JOE

"Aloha, suckers."

-from Hawaii Five-0

Pineapple Princess Tiki...

Sup, pukios!...I'm back!...And I'm ready for another blog entry...Are you?...I'll probably mostly write about my trip to Hawaii with Kristy...In fact, the next three blog entries might be a sorta description of our vacation to Waikiki...Although, I do wanna move on quickly to going back to writing about my life here in American Samoa...I'm sure most of you are tired of hearing about all of my vacations...Judging by your very few comments, maybe my blog has gotten boring...So, I'll spice up the next few blog entries with at least some questions to ponder...And today I have an extremely significant list...Lets begin...

As I said before, I just got back on Thursday from spending 12 days in Waikiki with my friend Kristy...We met eachother there, and it was alotta fun...The image above is real...No, folks, that's not a postcard!...An actual Hawaiian sunset...With no touch-ups on the computer...For reals, yo!...

The view from our hotel...Nah, not the ocean...But still breathtaking in its own way...

We got so wild and crazy on New Years Eve (too much mojito!) that we jumped in the closed, freezing hotel pool...With all of our clothes on!...We also ran up some restricted, off-limits, out-of-order escalators...Oh, my goodness gracious, we took over our hotel!...It was a blast...Crazy tourists from Wisconsin have attacked :-)

That guy clapping was, I think, from Argentina and he kept singing and clapping throughout the entire firework display celebrating New Years...It was hilarious...Oh, and did I mention there was a guy stripping right next to us?!...

There's Kristy gettin' a Polynesian tattoo at one of the many Luau's we went on...This Luau was okay...I liked the activities they had (tattooing, canoeing, lei-making, etc.) and the food was pretty good...I thought the actual performance was only so-so...I've seen so much dancing and singing here in American Samoa that I could probably be a judge on American Idol...I felt the dancing and singing in this Luau was kinda lacking some oomph...Or something...Also, the Samoan portion of the show had some really amatuer siva dancers...They weren't even really smiling...As I said, I'm kinda harsh because I've seen so many of these polynesian productions...

Those pictures above are wonderful...Lemme explain...Kristy and I are probably the biggest America's Next Top Model fans...I mean, we adore the show...We'll sit there and watch and discuss every single show and model when there's a marathon on...And we'll sit there for hours watching it...Even if we've seen that particular season a hundred times...It's our television show...Anyways, we decided to try to mimic some of those scenes from the show...So, we got all Tyra and tried our darndest to look "fierce" in some snapshots...I really think we made some connections with the camera...I mean, notice our ferocious eyes...We are so not catalogue...Tyra, Nigel, and Miss Jay would be proud, man...We're on our way to being America's next top models!...

There's Waikiki Beach...A jam-packed, world-famous, beautiful beach near Honolulu, Hawaii...Waikiki was pretty much a city...It almost reminded me of San Diego...And we stayed in Waikiki for mostly the entire vacation...So, I'm not quite sure if I truly saw the "real" Hawaii...The one I've been dreaming about...I mean, we did rent a car and drive out to the North Shore, the rural, more pure, less touristy section of the island of Oahu, and it was absolutely gorgeous...But we mostly experienced a city atmosphere...Eating out, shopping, and going to various activities...We were talking to some guy on the North Shore who explained to us that the people there have had to fight hard for years to stop the urban sprawl and keep their natural Hawaiian beauty intact...And Kristy and I were happy about that...The island doesn't need more hotels and parking lots and Starbucks and ABC Stores...The serenity and rawness of the North Shore is why people go there...And the excitement and decadence of the city is why people go to Waikiki...In a way, I liked Oahu for just that reason...It has the best of both worlds...The peace of the country-side and the opulence of the city...And it should stay that way...I hope it doesn't become one big Waikiki...Samoans sometime discuss their feelings to me about Hawaii...They say Hawaiians have "sold" their culture and their island...And I suppose, in a way, they have...Hawaiians have allowed their island to become a busy, polluted, concrete jungle just for a buck or two...But I do think that they've held on to their culture and are desperately struggling to hold on to their island...And I also still believe the island is dazzling...Not just for its natural, scenic views, but also for its people...The island seems to be a smorgesboard of diversity and different ethnicities...I mean, there were people all around the globe here...Like New York City, the actual humans may be just as beautiful as the scenery...Also, the hospitiality was amazing...I've never seen such helpful, happy workers...They'll do anything to make your stay comfortable and positive...(Well, our hotel sometimes had problems with this, but what can you expect from a hotel that only charges you $1,400 for 12 nights!)...You would never see hospitality like this in American Samoa...That's why tourists stay far, far away from this island...So, I think Samoans are just jealous...In other words, though Hawaii is makin' hella tons of cash off its culture and island, it's still a magnificent, blissful place to stay...

Okay, every year I make a list of the pop culture that's affected me for the better...I create an annual list of the movies, television shows, music and books that have changed me in some way...Or, at least, have entertained me and inspired me...I put these lists in a safe place so I can recall them later in my life...Note: the movies, television shows, music, and books do not have to have been produced in that year I'm writing about...You see, it's the pieces of art that I have discovered that year...They could be hundreds of years old for all I care...As long as I have encountered them for the first time in that year...It's my way of chronicling my life...Instead of writing in a overwhelming, time-consuming daily diary or even a annual journal of some sort, making this list is an easy, enjoyable way of remembering my past year...It's also a great way to spread the word on good works of art...So, here's my list for 2007...The popular culture that has influenced me...

My Life in Culture 2007:

10. Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (Music) = This bloody brilliant Broadway musical (almost 30 years old) is diabolically extravagant...I probably won't be able to see the Tim Burton directed, Johnny Depp starring film version until it's on video...I'm dying to see it...

9. Lost (Television) = Nothing will compare to the mind-shattering, jaw-dropping, shockingly twisty revelation at the end of last season's groundbreaking show...Some castaways survive and get off the island?!...And some want to go back after they've left it?!...OMG!...Everything has changed!...A literally stunning surprise...

8. Michael Buble (Music) = The closest I can find to Norah Jones...His smooth, elegant, subtle vocals have relaxed me for countless nights this year...He's no Norah, but he's still gracefully bluesy...

7. Harry Potter and the Deathy Hallows by J.K. Rowling (Book) = Not as unique or remarkable as the past books in the series, but the final 100 pages or so are some of the best I have ever read...Harry's encounter with death (will he or won't he die?) becomes more than just a question...It becomes a thoughtful, calming discovery of one of life's vast mysteries; death...

6. Ugly Betty (Television) = A hilarious, witty show that is non-stop funny...Every line from this intelligent show is funny as hell...Not only is this the most gay friendly show on television (with one of the warmest, realest gay relationships), it's also the most bright and delightful...

5. The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini (Book) = This haunting, powerful, epic novel about friendship, regret, and redemption is unforgettable...

4. Transformers (Film) = Alright, so maybe not everything on this list is incredibly meaningful...But I guess this 26-year-old man is still a boy on the inside...An astounding, awe-inspiring action flick roller coaster that features some of the bestest friends a guy could ever have...Optimus Prime and Bumble Bee!...Hell yeah!...

3. Once (Film and Music) = A rock musical that's kinda the complete opposite of Hairspray...This one is quietly observant and artistic...The music in this movie is heartwrenchingly emotional...I've listened to the raw, poignant, passionate songs a hundred times and I still feel moved by them...Rent this movie from Blockbuster ASAP...And then download the music from itunes...Do it now...

2. The Giver by Lois Lowry (Book) = Who woulda thunk that a book given to me by my young niece woulda been so philosophical...And beautiful...This amazingly insightful novel about living life to the fullest is riveting, provocative, and forces you to grapple with your own thoughts on life...The problem?...Why is this book only being read by grade-schoolers?...It should be read by everyone!...

1. Hairspray (Film and Music) = Okay, so some of you may have guessed this would top my list...But it's still the most electrifying, superb thing I've seen and heard all year...It's also a glittering, joyful, inspiring musical about acceptance and self-esteem...(Two issues I'm dealing with everyday!)...The music gets me belting and jiggling, and the energy from both the movie and the soundtrack seems to be happily spewing out explosively...You can't stop the beat to this charming, exhilirating lil' story...

Sole, I am so proud of my Samoan heritage...Er, you know what I mean...When Kristy and I went to the Polynesian Culture Center I was ecstatic to visit the Samoan village...You see, this museum/theme park lets visitors explore seven of the islands in the South Pacific...Consequently, visitors can play games in New Zealand, listen to drums in Tonga, go inside the huts of Marquesas, and meet a tribal leader in Fiji...It's a wonderful place and I highly recommend all Hawaii tourists to go to the PCC...Anyways, the Samoan section was what I was so excited to see...I mean, this is where I've been living for the past two years...Visiting this portion of the museum was like a confirmation for me...A validation of the culture I've been experiencing...It was hella tight...I was so eager to see this replica of Samoa that I even wore my ie lava lava and ula...What made it even more special was experiencing it with Kristy...She got to encounter just some of the Samoan adventure I've been encountering...It was seki...I'm 100% Samoan from this day forward ;-)

A sexy hottie (excuse the pun) from Samoa...You can tell he's Samoan by his tattoo...And his fire knife... No, not the one under his lava lava...Sickos!...

There's the Samoan siva dancers in the pageant...All of the polynesian islands floated down the make-shift, Disney World-esque river in a delightful Disney Land-like parade...It was cool...

Of course, the Samoan part of the center was always the most entertaining...I've said it once and I'll keep saying this: Samoans are experts in performance...They know exactly how to entertain an audience...And this Samoan performer was comical, energetic, and amusing...His presentation on Samoan cooking and tree climbing was one of the best parts of the Polynesian Culture Center...Samoans truly are the happy people of the South Pacific...

It wouldn't be a vacation with Joe without the posed action shots...We're such good actors...

"Aloha, everybody, my name is Tiki!"

Tahiti's rump shaking always turned me on...I mean, I don't even like girls, but there's something mesmerizing and alluring with the way they bump their booties to and fro...I like Tahitian butts and I cannot lie...

Um, I was having a little too much fun with my brand spankin' new hat...When the leaves turn brown (yes, the hat's real!), I'll totally wear the hat everyday on my walk to school...Protection from the sun AND a fashion statement!...I'll be a total lawasa!...

I gotta go now...Thanks again for reading...And thanks to Kristy, my Pineapple Princess Tiki, for coming with me to Hawaii...I couldn't ask for a better friend...

Now, blog readers, what do you think?...Did Hawaii sell its soul to capitialism?...Is there too much urban sprawl there?...Is its culture dead because of too much tourism?...Is the pure beauty of the island destroyed by commercialism?...And how about your list of the top cultural influences on you this year?...You don't have to give me a top ten...Just write back with a couple of the movies, television shows, music, and books that inspired and entertained you this year...Hell, open my eyes to some stuff I haven't seen yet...Recommend a good book or some great music for us all...I'll even give you extra points! :-)

Love ya and miss ya...

-JOE

"I saw you in my dreams,

We were walking hand in hand,

On a white, sandy beach of Hawaii.

We were playing in the sun,

We were having so much fun,

On a white, sandy beach of Hawaii.
-from Israel Kamakawiwo's "White Sandy Beach of Hawaii"